i miss you so much, i hardly know what to do. nothing has been the same since you rode that thin chiffon wave between here and gone, and were so suddenly gone. i remember you every day, look at our pictures, try to move on in life and love and music but nothing and no one compares. you were the heart of my heart, my precious angel, you were my baby and my joy.

it's your humor i miss the most-- the endless stories about oklahoma (what i'd give to hear them all again, even for the 1,001th time!), your caricatures, your tales of cheddr the wonderdog (how do you like them paws?) and the alliteration games. the silly faces you'd make when we were driving -- my god! how i miss your unself-conscious antics and the way we related to one another, like children. truly, i learned how to play when i met you.

and how i miss your heart, which it turns out was the faulty part: your compassion for critters, your devotion to spiritual pursuits, and the way you poured it all into your beautiful and heart- wrenching music. what a joy it was to stand on stage with you and be a part of that wave of grace. what a gift you gave me -- my own voice. what a time we had. baby, what a time we had!

i don't know what the future holds. the time of endless signs in the natural world, or meetings in the dream realm, has ceased. and i miss you more than ever. i hear the drum. you were the one. now, the days are dark and dreary, and baby it's just hard to be alive with all these memories but without YOU. you were endless joy and light to me, you were the spring. you coaxed out the living, the beautiful, the tender and the green. you're on a different journey now. my world is not the same. i miss saying your name.

baby think of me sometime when you're shining around. you still have my heart.