It has only been three weeks since you passed away but yet it seems as though it was yesterday. Everyday I think of you and I can see your face clearly in my head. At times I am so mad because you are not here with me anymore. I remember how you used to tell me that it hurt you, because you lost your mother at the age of eighteen, and that she was not here to help you in your time of need. Now I understand how you felt for I am only a year older than you was when you lost your mother and now I have lost mine. I sat down and asked god why, why did he have to take you. Just as you and I were starting to rebuild our mother daughter relationship your were ripped away from me. I can not change things because it is not my descision. It just hurts that you won't be here to share the joys of my life with me. Mom I just hope that you knew when you passed away how much I loved you and how much you meant to me. I knew you were so much happier I could see it. I don't hate you for what you had done. In fact I am glad that you died happier than what you had been in a long time. I do understand though that little Lyle needed you now more than we do so he took you away to heaven with him. It's just hard to know and have to understand that I can't never hug you again or come to you when I'm hurt and need that motherly love, because you won't be there for me. They say some people get mad at the person that passed away for dieing, but I wasn't mad at you. I was mad at god. In which I shouldn't have been, but I felt it wasn't right because I felt as though I still need you, and even though it is true that I still need you there is nothing that I can do. You are gone and I just have to respect god's descision and not be upset with him for it. I love you mom. Now I understand the saying that you only get one mom and dad in life and you better enjoy and cherish the time you got with them. I just know that I will cherish the memories I did get with you for the rest of my life. Even though you were taken away from me. The memories I have can not be taken away from me. I will have them forever. I just want you to know that even if we never do meet again even when I leave this world I'll never stop loving you. You are first and for most and will always be my mom and I Love YOU

LOVE ALWAYS AND FOREVER YOUR DAUGHTER ESTHER VIOCK

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