In Loving Memory of

April 26, 1968 - March 23, 2000

Min, I miss you a lot. There is not a moment of the day that I don't think about you. I still can't believe that you are gone. It seems impossible. I have a large picture of you and I when we first came to the US. I look at it from time to time and tears form in my eyes. When I think back on our lives, our memories make me cry more. We fought like cats and dogs when we were young. I remember we always blamed each other for everything.

But as we grew, so did our relationship. I believe that we were the closest brother and sister ever. We shared a lot of good times and bad. Not many siblings hang out together or have the same friends. I really enjoyed partying and fighting and confiding in you. I told you secrets about me that I never told anyone, because I knew that you would truthfully care. Min, I really love you and miss you. A part of me is gone forever. I feel like a loner in this cold world. I have my own family now, but I need you also.

I try to be strong. Mostly for mom and dad. As you know, dad visits you often and mom is not ready yet. I have many things to be happy about, but I am sad inside. I cried a lot the night you past away and during your funeral and have not cried since. I always feel like I am going to cry, but I hold it back because I don't want anybody to see me. It's hard since I live with my in-laws. Sometimes, I want to go home and wish that I never got married. Then I would have been home all the time and maybe I could have spent more time with you/be concerned about you.

Sometimes I hate God for taking you so soon. It's really not fair. There is so much more for you to do and experience. You have another nephew and you won't be here to spend time with them or watch them grow. Did you know that after you past away, when we went to NY, Junior opened the door to your room and looked around, then stared at your computer. It was like he was expecting you to be in your chair in front of the monitor. Whenever we asked him "Where is your uncle?" he would point to your picture. I cried a lot in your room.

I don't really know how to handle your not being here. It is unnatural. Sometimes I think that I'm going to have a breakdown. And sometimes I want to run away. But most of the time, I wish you would come back.

You are alive in my memories. I love you. Your sister, Taylor...



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