In Loving Memory of
thomas edward hart


i love you and i miss you. don't ever forget that.

my sheets are cold, i can't not shiver. it's almost midnight. no caffeine to be had and i'm wide awake. i flip through my yearbooks wondering why you never signed them. i can't find the little things i'm looking for. i can't find anything at all. i don't want time to move forward anymore cause that's one more minute you're gone. i remember what you wore the last three times i saw you. you had that belt buckle on, the one you were so proud of. i can hear your voice and how you laughed. i remember how you seemed to just grow overnight. i remember how all of a sudden you were this heartbreaker. i can remember those little details. you had wooden floors in your room. and bunkbeds. i called you every night in seventh grade to reassure you you were hot. and you still treated me like it was no big deal, like you were my best friend and the crush didn't affect any part of it. you remembered my middle name after all these years, and i, yours. i pretended i was someone else in ninth grade so i could find out if you liked me. and even though i think you knew it was me, you still said you did. that was one of the best days of my life. i didn't care that you smoked. you still smelled good. i told you i loved you before you died. i told you that i always thought you were the coolest guy, a gentleman, perfect. there wasn't a mean bone in your body. i went to see you at work so many times but i never knew your schedual. i'm still shaking. i never got to kiss you when the time was right. you didn't go to prom with me, we just kind of forgot about our plans. you gave really great hugs. you held people tightly to you. i cried over you before and i'm crying over you now, albeit for a different reason. you rode in my car, you bought me chai, and pulled my chair out for me while we sat outside at starbucks. we went to toys r us until midnight, just talking in the parking lot. i stuck up for you when a girl called you an asshole. we layed in the grass at the franklin lanes. you were the kindest boy i know. but i didn't call you the last time you ever asked me to. i'm sorry.

thomas edward hart. april 18, 1985 - july 23, 2002.

e.h.j.


  

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